Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
Randomize