how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
I love millennial parents. One of the moms at the daycare center literally told me she and her husband named two of her kids after batman characters and one after game of thrones
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