dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
Randomize
