i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
Randomize
