I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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