it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
I wish there was a hungover fairy to brush my teeth and bring me a diet coke.
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
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