I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize
