alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
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