so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize
