You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
splinters make it hard to masturbate
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
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