I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
Sometimes I forget to take my socks off when I masturbate. This always makes me feel like I'm accidentally in a porn.
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Randomize
