also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
Randomize
