Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Randomize
