I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
Slutty costumes are my most sacred holiday tradition! Wearing a not-slutty costume is like putting cheezwiz on a communion wafer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
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