Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
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