Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
Randomize
