Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
just balanced a champagne glass on my gut. thanks to beer im a living breathing tempur-pedic mattress.
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
Randomize
