It's like God shit irony all over that family
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
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