69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
Randomize
