I'm going to jail i love you
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
Let's say we can see the evolution of our "relation" by his name in my phone. Pizza slice emoticone. Pizza guy. Jordan. Jo. Jackhammer Pizza Guy. Jockhammer pizza guy.
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
Randomize
