Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
Is this like a preordered booty call?
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
