a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
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