she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
Randomize
