he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
The cat just brought me a bottle opener. I think she's my soulmate.
I'd ask how but then you'd tell me.
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
Randomize
