Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Randomize
