Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
I had a dream last night that I had to pretend I liked Dave Matthews Band to impress this girl I was talking to.
I guess it was more of a nightmare.
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
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