Don't you send me to vm
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
I've been alternating between telling people I was mauled by a bear or hit by a car to explain the massive unexplainable bruise on my leg. Slightly more worried now that the car idea is believable.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Driving from bar to bar trying to recover all of the possessions I've drunkenly lost over the course of the past few nights. Actual nadir of my life and absolute height of shamblyness.
Props for using the word nadir
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
I just checked and if you bring a picture of your ex they will shred it and give you a free 'hater shot'. Would it be too much to print off one of their wedding pictures and bring it?
I really love that you're not going the 'why am I not married and having a kid yet?' route, but rather 'thank god I dodged that bullet'
Randomize