i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
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