Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
Randomize
