god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
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