piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
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He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
I am so dumb. I made a mistake and let him get away.
Don't worry, there are other penises in the sea.
Thanks, mom.
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