lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
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