what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
We were drunk at 3am with no food. I sent him to the lobby with ninety cents for like a bag of chips and I swear on my life he came back with a meatball sub
...did you ask him where he got a meatball sub at 3:00am?
He just kept mumbling something about being a hunter/gatherer
Oh AND he got us two bags of chips.
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
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