so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
My new roommate is one of my Tinder matches... It is so on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
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