So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
just woke up and this girl had my cellphone nestled in the front of her thong. i kept thinking "is this a trap?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
Randomize