"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
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She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
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That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
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