I feel like I'm in dance class right now
We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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