You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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