oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
be right there i have to get my cape
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
Randomize
