Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
Dear Penis Owner...our records show that you are overdue for servicing...please contact our friendly associates to schedule a thoroughly satisfying experience today...operators are standing by...
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
Randomize
