U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
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