I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
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