forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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