Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
Randomize
