Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
I thought I was pretty much sober now but then I realized I've been eating scrambled eggs with my hands...
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
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