If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
