i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
i can't believe i had my finger in that
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you know how awkward it is to call the bar from last night and ask if they found my leggings?
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
Randomize