You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
I'm gonna fight the coyote
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
Randomize
