She told me she only masterbates to Kenny Rogers songs.
OMG. What did u say?
I told her I did too.
now i know why i became what i already was.
We got so high we made milksteak
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
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