More tranny stories later!
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
It's 11:50 on Friday the 13th. There's a full moon. AND the bride to be just puked on herself while getting a lap dance from a stripper named...wait for it....LUCKY. Is this real life?
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
the insurance claim form from last night says foreign object removal from genitourinary tract so as far as the insurance company knows, it could have been a gerbil
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
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