Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
The sex would be better if it wasn’t interrupted because his home detention ankle monitor needed charging. At least I know he’s not cheating on me
Do you even hear yourself?
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