There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
Randomize
